Hazrat Khadija had known our Holy Prophet (PBUH) since he was a child. Having him deliver her goods to Mecca had been a means of getting to know him better.
Hazrat Khadija possessed the highest degree of nobility, wealth, and repute among the Qurayshi women. At the same time, Allah had granted her beauty that few women have been bestowed with.
Until that time, many men from her tribe had proposed marriage to her, yet she did not accept any proposals. (1) In fact, it was as if she was not thinking about marriage.
However, fate brought someone who was completely different before her. The beauty in his soul was reflected on his face, the love in his heart had been transformed into his smile, and the deep thoughts in his mind had been manifested as an exceptional person who possessed both seriousness and sincerity.
Hazrat Khadija, who had rejected the marriage proposals of all of the renowned figures in Mecca and had not been interested in getting married, changed her mind as soon as she became further acquainted with this incomparable person.
Divine fate had predestined these two people to feel love for one another. Despite everything, the notables and rich people of Quraysh could not spoil the program designed by qadar.
A proposal from Khadija
A marriage proposal came from Khadija herself. Khadija was referred to by the nickname, “Tahira” which meant “pure one” because she would safeguard her chastity and honor; a quality that, even during the age of ignorance, was held in high-regard.
Khadija’s best friend, Nafisa delivered the proposal to our Holy Prophet (PBUH). The following conversation took place between the two:
“Oh Muhammad, what is preventing you from getting married?”
“I do not have enough money to get married!”
“If that was taken care of, then would you accept an invitation to wealth, beauty, repute, and partnership?”
“Who is she?”
“Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadija”
“But how can it be?”
"Everything will be taken care of.”
“In that case, I accept”. (2)
Nafisa conveyed the message to Hazrat Khadija in a state of happiness.
Khadija’s immeasurable gladness could be seen in the smiles on her face. After having a delightful and pleasurable encounter with Nafisa, Khadija sent this message to our Holy Prophet (PBUH), “Oh my uncle’s son, I desire to marry you because you are my relative (3) and a dignified, trustworthy, well-mannered, and honest person from this tribe.” (4)
Our Holy Prophet (PBUH), who received this marriage proposal, informed his uncle of this matter.
Abu Talib confirmed this proposal by directly asking Hazrat Khadija; he learned straight from her that she wanted this marriage.
The Marriage Ceremony
The date of the marriage ceremony was determined by Hazrat Khadija and the ceremony was to take place in her home.
Our Holy Prophet (PBUH), his uncles, his aunts, and some of the leading figures from the sons of Hashim came to Hazrat Khadija’s home on the set date.
Hazrat Khadija provided everything that would ensure a beautiful wedding ceremony. The sheep were slaughtered and the food was prepared.
After the food was eaten, it was time for the oldest ones on both sides to speak, which was in accordance with their custom. Hazrat Khadija’s father had passed away in the Battle of Fijar. For this reason, her uncle, Amr bin Asad, was her representative for the ceremony.
According to the tradition, Abu Talib would be the first to speak. Therefore, he stood up and said:
“Thanks be to Allah for he has created us from Ibrahim’s progeny, Ismail’s bloodline, Maad’s minerals, and Mudar’s descent. After this, I get straight to the point and say:
“As you know, my brother’s son, Muhammad bin Abdullah, is your relative. No youth from the Quraysh can be compared to him. He is superior to them in terms of repute, intelligence, honor, and virtue.
“Yes, he has very little property, but what does that mean? It is a transient shadow and curtain, something temporary that is given and then taken away.
“I swear by Allah that his rank is going to increase and grow even more from now on.
“He now asks for your daughter Khadija’s hand in marriage and pledges to give 20 male camels for her dowry.”
When Abu Talib finished speaking, the son of Hazrat Khadija’s uncle, Waraqa bin Nawfal, rose to speak. He said:
“Thanks be to Allah for He has created us like you have described. He has granted us a far greater degree of superiority than you have mentioned. We also want to be honored and establish kinship with you.
“Oh, the community of Quraysh! Bear witness that I marry Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadija, to Muhammad bin Abdullah, the son of Abdullah, for the price of this dowry”.
When Waraqa bin Nawfal had finished speaking, Abu Talib wanted Hazrat Khadija’s paternal uncle, Amr bin Asad, to express his consent. Amr also rose to his feet and said, “Oh the community of Quraysh, bear witness that I have joined Muhammad bin Abdullah and Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadija in marriage.”
Thus, the Master of the Universe (PBUH) was married to Khuwaylid’s daughter, Hazrat Khadija aI-Kubra, who had the most reputable ancestry as well as the most honor and wealth among the Qurayshi women. In the meantime, our Holy Prophet (PBUH) was 25 years old whereas Hazrat Khadija was 40. Their marriage took place in 595 AD; 15 years before his Prophethood.
Then, our Holy Prophet (PBUH) brought his esteemed wife with him to Abu Talib’s home. Here they slaughtered two camels and threw a banquet for the community.
Out of regard for this happy occasion, Abu Talib slaughtered his camels and fed the community and then afterwards, invited our Holy Prophet (PBUH) and his family to his home.
When he went out to greet them, he thanked Allah in the midst of his tears by saying, “Praise to be Allah for He has dispelled all of our sadness away from us.”
Our Holy Prophet (PBUH) and Hazrat Khadija, who had attained the honor of being our Holy Prophet’s (PBUH) first wife, only stayed a few days in Abu Talib’s home. Afterwards, they returned to Hazrat Khadija’s home in which they would spend their blissful lives.
The Master of the Universe (PBUH) did not marry anyone else while this pure woman, who he referred to as “Khadija aI-Kubra”, was alive. (5) He found every kind of consolation and bliss in this home.
Nothing had really been left to our Holy Prophet (PBUH) from his father’s inheritance. In addition, Abu Talib, who had been our Holy Prophet’s guardian for a long time, was in extreme poverty. In this regard, our Holy Prophet (PBUH) had led a life filled with thousands of hardships and difficulties until he married Hazrat Khadija.
After he married Hazrat Khadija, he used her wealth for the purpose of trade and attained a certain degree of abundance. Nevertheless, despite his wife’s ample wealth, he always avoided extravagance, show-off, and luxury. He continued living his life in a plain and humble fashion. Furthermore, he did not allow worldly wealth to occupy his heart in anyway; completely different kinds of divine and holy feelings had embosomed his glorious soul. The love of this world was never able to unravel those divine feelings.
Afterwards, Hazrat Khadija had six children from our Holy Prophet (PBUH): Qasim, Zainab, Ruqiyyah, Umm Kulthum, Fatima, and Abdullah (Tayyib-Tahir)- in chronological order. (6)
Our Holy Prophet (PBUH)’s and Hazrat Khadija’s most divine feelings had merged in their happy home. Mutual trust, sincere respect, and love governed their family dynamics. Although Hazrat Khadija was fifteen years older than her husband, she was always conscientious, sensitive, and immensely polite towards her husband. Our Holy Prophet (PBUH) deeply loved his esteemed wife so much that even after her death, he never tossed away his love for her and kept their eternal togetherness in an exclusive part of his heart.
Our Holy Prophet (PBUH) would always mention Hazrat Khadija’s generosity, benevolence, and all the help that she provided. This reminiscence was enough to rouse our mother Hazrat Aisha’s jealousy and make her say, “I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadija.” (7)
How could he not mention her? She was the mother of his children except for one. She extended her friendship to him while everyone else had become an enemy. She consoled him in the face of all kinds of torture and troubles. While everyone had turned their backs to him, she never left his side.
Of course, our Holy Prophet (PBUH) would always reminisce about and would never forget his wife who possessed eminent virtues and an eminent bond of sentiment.
[1] Ibn Hisham, Sirah, V. 1, p. 201; Ibn Sa’d, Tabaqat, V. 1, p. 131.
[2] Ibn Sa’d, ibid, V. 1, p. 131.
[3] The fathers of both Hazrat Khadija and our Holy Prophet (PBUH) had descended from Qusay. Similarly, their genealogies shared Luay, who was one of our Holy Prophet (PBUH)’s forefathers from his father’s side of the family and an ancestor from the side of Hazrat Khadija’s mother.
[4] Ibn Hisham, ibid, V. 1, p. 200-201; Tabari, Tarikh, V. 2, p. 197
[5] Ibn Hisham, ibid, V. 1, p. 201.
[6] Abu’l-Qasim Abdurrahman as- Suhayli, Rawdu’l-Unf, V. 1, p. 214.
[7] Muslim, Sahih, V. 7, p. 133.
nice artical . @ Admin: thanks for sharing …
Well done! Thanx for such a good information…May Allah guide all muslims to use the right way of marriage..Ameen